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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25941643">Hey Pretty Boy</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/WitcherSexual/pseuds/WitcherSexual'>WitcherSexual</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Witcher Kink Bingo [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Bisexual Lambert (The Witcher), Clubbing, Gen, Jaskier and Geralt are done, Lambert gets drunk, M/M, No Sex, Partying, Pre-Slash, Security Guard Eskel, Texting, alcohol consumption, drunk Lambert</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 06:27:04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,400</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25941643</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/WitcherSexual/pseuds/WitcherSexual</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>For The Witcher Flash Fic Week 6! </p><p>Lambert goes out drinking and overestimates how much he can handle in a night.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Eskel/Lambert (The Witcher), Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia &amp; Lambert, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion, Jaskier | Dandelion &amp; Lambert</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Witcher Kink Bingo [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1900654</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>63</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>The Witcher Flash Fic Challenge #006</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Hey Pretty Boy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>For my bingo card, the Intoxication slot</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Lambert danced with the body beside him, he tried to remember the person's name but it was lost in the past, he felt someone grab at his ass and he turned around to say something but someone else grabbed his arm and pulled him away from the dance floor. The hand was warm on his skin and he wanted to complain that it would mess his body paint up but no words came out.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He blinked a few times in an attempt to see who it was in front of him but the room was too bright and the music was too loud for him. He let the person manhandle him into a seat and say something but Lambert couldn’t hear anything. Lambert shook his head at the drink they placed in front of him and he watched as they rolled their eyes but took a drink of it first. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>It isn’t drugged then.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Lambert shrugged and took a drink before trying to stand up again, but the person pushed him back onto the seat and Lambert looked back up at him, the lights of the room were still bright but he could make out the person’s black shirt and a word writing on it. He looked at the person’s face and focused on those lips, they looked so kissable and soft he just wanted to- his hand was pushed away as he tried to touch the person’s face and he frowned.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ru-Rude. Wanna touchy soft lippys,” Lambert moved his gaze to the person’s eyes and was struck by how gorgeous they were, he watched the golden eyes flicker as the person laughed at him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kid I need to phone someone to pick you up,” Lambert tried to poke the person’s chest but missed and fell forward into them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I am very old, so old.” The person laughed again and even with the noise of the club Lambert could hear how soft it was. He reached up again and the person wasn’t fast enough to stop him from touching his face, he felt a scar running down the left side of their face. His hand was pushed away before he could touch anything else and the handsome person growled at him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kid you are drunk, I need someone to come pick you up. Or an address to get you a Taxi home.” Lambert tried to remember his address but the handsome person looked so good and his mind blanked again. “Kid do you have your phone?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lambert nodded and tried to find his phone in his pockets, the light from the room making his body paint glitter and look brighter than it was, he found his phone and handed it to the person who raised an eyebrow at him but didn’t say anything as he opened it and stared at the screen. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Password kid?” Lambert nodded and took his phone back from the person as he tried to remember his password, he gave up and used his fingerprint. The screen hurt his eyes as the bright light shone up and he tried to focus to find the green phone icon. He felt the person come closer to him and tap at his phone before he heard it ringing someone. He held it in his hands and watched the screen darken as the person answered on the other end. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His phone was taken from his hands and he went to fight with whoever took it but the handsome person was talking to them on the other side of his phone and he turned around, Lambert finally focussed on the writing and was able to read  ‘Security’ in big white letters. He really should have checked that before letting the person have his phone and buy him a drink. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He ignored the conversation he was having with whoever he phone before his phone was handed back to him. “Well Lambert you have a friend coming to get you. A Jaskier? Let’s get you some fresh air before he gets here.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Jaskier, he would tell Vesemir and that would result in a way too long rant about drinking, ugh.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fine pretty one.” Lambert stood and felt the room sway under his feet before the handsome person held him up and they walked away from the noise and lights. Lambert felt the cold air hit him and regretted not wearing a shirt, he shivered and huddled closer to the body beside him as they stood at the door. A few people waved at the person beside him but no one came up to them and Lambert was thankful because he didn’t want to talk to anyone ever again, not with the pounding in his head.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lambert do you have a coat or shirt?” Lambert shook his head and the person sighed before pulling him closer, Lambert felt the heat from them and relaxed slightly. He felt the person pull their phone out and text someone, it was a few minutes later when someone else came up to them holding a coat did he realize what the handsome one did. He was wrapped in the coat and tried to discreetly sniff but the laugh from beside him said it wasn’t discreet at all.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It took Jaskier at least half an hour to arrive and Lambert flinched as Geralt left the car too, that rant about drinking would come faster than he wanted. The two of them walked over to them and Lambert could see how pissed Geralt was but his brother didn’t say anything as the person behind him moved to talk to him. Jaskier took one look at him before frowning and pulling him into a hug and moving him to Geralt and the handsome person.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He heard them talking and Geralt sighed but nodded and shook their hand. He sounded pissed when he spoke, “Thank you</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Eskel,” Lambert smiled, that was a nice name. It suited them</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thank you Eskel,” Geralt looked at Lambert and he hunched his shoulders at the anger in his eyes, “Lambert give the coat back.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No please keep it, I have many of them.” Lambert nodded and tried to look away from Eskel’s eyes but they looked gorgeous, he never wanted to look away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, I insist you take it back, we have a cover in the car,” Geralt smiled and Lambert frowned, he wanted to keep the coat, it was soft and warm.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s okay, I don’t need it and I have a feeling I’ll see him again,” Lambert didn’t argue with that because he was definitely coming back to see Eskel again anot not even a Vesemir rant could stop him doing that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I think one of us will come with him next time.” Jaskier nodded in agreement and Lambert pouted before Eskel nodded and smiled.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s a good idea, well I need to get back to work. I’ll see you glittery boy.” Lambert blushed before ducking away and walked with Jaskier and Geralt back to the car. They were both quiet as he sat in the back and Lambert could feel the tension between them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why did you think it was a good idea to go out drinking half naked?” Geralt sounded like he was trying to stay calm and Lambert pulled the coat closer around him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I am covered, just not how you like me to be,” He looked out the window and watched the lights from the buildings blur as they drove past them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lambert you are wearing shorts and you are covered in silver fucking bodypaint. That is not covered, you didn’t even tell anyone where you were going so if anything happened how were we going to know?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fuck off Geralt, I’m a grown adult and can do what I fucking want to do.” Jaskier took Geralt’s hand and squeezed it and his brother took a breath to calm down and Lambert wanted to curse them out for being happy together.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fine, you are in our spare room tonight, don’t throw up on our bed.” Geralt turned back to the front and held Jaskier’s hand as he drove them home and Lambert scoffed before looking for his phone. He turned the brightness down and looked at the messages he had missed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Some from the group chat, Aiden sent him a meme and an unknown number. He clicked that message and frowned at the message ‘Hey glitter boy’ with nothing else. </span>
  <em>
    <span>What the fuck?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Who did he add? Or who added him? He didn’t hook up with anyone because fucking Eskel stopped him- Eskel. Eskel called him glittery boy. Fuck he had Eskel’s phone number.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He put his phone away and closed his eyes for a nap before Jaskier was pulling up to their home and opening his door for him. Lambert stumbled out and grabbed onto Jaskier who helped him up the stairs and into the house.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can you go for a shower now?” Lambert shook his head and regretted it because he felt all the alcohol from the night swirl and threatened to come back up. “Fine but you are getting and old bed sheet,”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Geralt was locking up as Jaskier helped him up the stairs and into the spare room. He tried to take his shorts off but he fell onto the bed before he could and gave up, they would be a tomorrow problem. He felt Jaskier pull the covers over him and say good night before the door was shut and the light was turned off, he closed his eyes and let sleep take him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>-</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lambert woke and groaned as the light from outside hit his face, he brought the covers over his head and tried to bring the world into a suitable noise level. He could hear Geralt and Jaskier move around and talk to each other, they had music playing and Lambert tried to shut it out but it wouldn’t work. His head was pounding as he moved, </span>
  <em>
    <span>he was never drinking again. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lambert you need to get up,” Geralt’s voice carries up the stairs and Lambert groaned again but knew if he didn’t get up then Geralt would come up and get him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fucking dick. I hate drinking.” Lambert opened his eyes and spotted his hand and squinted as he saw it was silver. </span>
  <em>
    <span>What the fuck?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Oh, yeah</span>
  </em>
  <span>. He painted his body silver for the club he should wash it off, he caught a small patch on his arm where it was smudged off and looked at it. A handprint, a big handprint. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He tried to remember who he was with that left the mark, he didn’t go home with anyone and he didn’t feel like he had gotten fucked. It was too big to be Geralt or Jaskier. Fuck the handsome person. The security guy with the lips. </span>
  <span>Lambert picked his phone up and checked his messages again, and there it was the message. He tapped his phone a few times before shutting it off and dropping it beside him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Eskel has his number and saw him make a fool of himself. He sighed and got up to start his day, he knew that a rant from Vesemir was coming and one from Geralt, Jaskier,  Aiden and most likely Yennefer. He sighed again and stood from the bed and walked down the stairs to see Jaskier and Geralt sitting at the table. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wow you look a mess, here have coffee.” Jaskier laughed as he handed him a coffee and Lambert drank it while glaring at him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He placed the cup down and looked down at it as he tapped the side of it. “Did you tell him?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They both knew who he meant, and Jaskier nodded his head and Lambert groaned but didn’t say anything else. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Eat something then have a shower. Ciri is coming over today so be presentable,” Geralt handed him a plate of eggs and bacon and Lambert nodded before digging in and eating it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That guy last night, do you think they were gay?” Jaskier laughed and Geralt shrugged at him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, text him.” Lambert looked at Jaskier and narrowed his eyes, he didn’t mention getting his number. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How do you know I have his number?” Jaskier smirked and tapped his nose before turning to the sink and cleaning the dishes. Lambert was about to complain but his phone pinged again and he looked down at it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>From: Unknown Number</b>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hey glittery boy hope that hangover doesn’t hurt to much </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Lambert looked at Jaskier who was smiling at him and Lambert typed a reply out, </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck it he was handsome. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>To: Eskel</b>
</p><p>
  <span>Hey handsome. Why don’t you meet me and I’ll show you how good I feel </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>From: Eskel</b>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe later. I’m just up from work </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>To: Eskel </b>
</p><p>
  <span>I can’t wait </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>From: Eskel</b>
</p><p>
  <span>You just want to see my ‘soft lippys’ again </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Lambert groaned as he remembered his terrible attempt at flirting from the night before. Who let him drink? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>To: Eskel</b>
</p><p>
  <span>I was drunk last night nothing counts</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>From: Eskel </b>
</p><p>
  <span>Sure pretty boy </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>To: Eskel </b>
</p><p>
  <span>Rude</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>From: Eskel</b>
</p><p>
  <span>I’m free tomorrow for lunch if you want? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>To: Eskel </b>
</p><p>
  <span>Yeah sure. I’ll bring your coat back for you </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>From: Eskel </b>
</p><p>
  <span>Thanks pretty boy </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>To: Eskel</b>
</p><p>
  <span>I’m not a child </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>From: Eskel </b>
</p><p>
  <span>Yeah but you are pretty </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Lambert put his phone down as he tried to find a good answer to that, Jaskier picked his phone up and answered for him before laughing. He grabbed his phone and stared at the message. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>To: Eskel</b>
</p><p>
  <span>Where would you like for tomorrow? I know this great Italian place in the city</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>From: Eskel</b>
</p><p>
  <span>That sounds lovely. I can pick you up if you want?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>To: Eskel</b>
</p><p>
  <span>Sure. I’ll send you my address later</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>From: Eskel</b>
</p><p>
  <span>I’m off to the gym. I’ll see you tomorrow pretty boy</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>To: Eskel</b>
</p><p>
  <span>Still not a child</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Lambert could hear Geralt and Jaskier snickering at him as he texted Eskel and he resisted the urge to curse them out for it. Jaskier tapped Geralt’s nose and Lambert faked gagged which got a glare from his brother but he ignored him in favor of finishing his eggs and bacon.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jaskier left them with a wave and Geralt started to clean up for their guests later, Lambert helped him before he headed up for a shower. He watched the glitter paint swirl in the drain and watched as Eskel’s handprint left and returned to his own skin color.</span>
</p>
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